Friday, August 24, 2012

Notes on Surviving Elvie's Hospitalizations, Attachment at the Hospital, Etc.

elvie loves phae
Photo to illustrate magnificent cheeks. Also titled "LOOK HOW FAT MY BABY IS HOORAY!" and "Is it okay if I lick this kitty?"

I've been thinking a lot about Elvie's hospitalizations and how they affected our family, plus what we can do better next time. I get really excited that she's gaining weight and that she will be able to have her big surgery in the coming months (fingers crossed to get it done in 2012), but at the same time, every time I walk home from the N stop, I am reminded of how hectic those hospital days were, and how I am not looking forward to keeping that kind of schedule again. (Not to mention not looking forward to seeing Elvie in great pain.) However, it is necessary, and we are looking forward to Elvie being able to move closer to a more normal life. So I've also been planning for the next hospital stay, and I found that I am grateful not only that Elvie got the care she needed to get well during her hospital stays, but also that it gave Jarod and me a chance to experience hospital life and be ready for the next time. I've done a little series on hospital life over at Babble, in hopes that it will help other families experiencing hospitalization of their child, and that it will help jog my memory when it's time to go back.

The Unexpected Gifts of Elvie's Unexpected Hospital Stays
When Your Baby is Sick: The Practicalities of Hospital Life
When Your Baby is Sick: 12 Things to Bring to the Hospital
When Your Baby is Sick: 10 Things to Bring to the Hospital for Yourself
When Your Baby is Sick: What a Normal Hospital Day is Like
When Your Newly Adopted Baby is Sick: Promoting Attachment in a Hospital Setting

smiley eyes
This one is just for you, just because. You're welcome!

And if you want more to read--I mean, I know some of you are weekend warriors, but most of you just like to relax and read the internet, am I right?--here are some other posts I've done lately over at Babble.

First up, I whine a little bit about two kids! so hard! harder than one kid! I mean, duh, but if you're in the same boat with family expansion, hopefully you'll feel better that it's not just you.
Transitioning From One Child to Two: Yes, It's As Hard As They Say It Is

Second, which maybe should be first, I talk about our open adoptions. This is something I feel strongly about. If you are an adoptive family and have the opportunity (or can make the opportunity) to keep a connection to your children's first families, I highly recommend doing so.
Keeping Our Daughters Connected to Their Ethiopian Families

Any adoption requires being comfortable with uncertainy; I think that parenting in general does. However, walking into special needs adoption requires a whole new level of letting go.
Special Needs Adoption: Being Uncomfortable With Uncertainty

And now, some photos of Zinashi. Because I know you miss seeing her smiling face on a regular basis:

matchy matchy
Her nail color matches her furry vest and her sticker. The sparkles on her nails match her shirt. Because that's just how you are supposed to do it.

zinashi and her "baby"
Zinashi adopted this baby, and she says it's cuter than my baby, by which she means Elvie. Her reasoning? Because her baby "has more fur." Whatever, weirdo.

If that's not enough Elvie and Zinashi cuteness, there's an Elvie-centric slideshow here, documenting her chubbing up progress, plus one featuring both girls here. You know you wanna click over. DO IT.


  1. I'm so glad Elvie is feeling better and chunking up! She and Zinashi are so beautiful and clearly thriving.

  2. I think the fact that you are there will make such a difference. Seriously. It is hard, obviously, brutally hard. But when she's scared or hurting, you will be there to comfort her, and that has to do so much to build attachment and trust. She will know she is not alone while she is going through it all, and I really think that will boost attachment.


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